Tag Archives: humor

Women I Would Sleep with if I Had a Noble Title 2 Comments Read more »

Women I Would Sleep with if I Had a Noble Title

With the non-stop talk of the balding Prince William’s marriage to that hot piece of ass (unexpectedly, because she’s British) Kate Middleton, I figured I’d talk royalty today. It’s 2011, we have satellites in outer space that tell us where the nearest place to eat…

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Things I Would Do if I Had a Terminal Illness 1 Comment Read more »

Things I Would Do if I Had a Terminal Illness

Being the polarizing driving force behind a blog with controversial critiques and potty humor means I spend a lot of time thinking about being murdered via a poetic stab in the neck with a filleting knife. Getting my ass kicked by a couple of roided…

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A Lesson in Food 5 Comments Read more »

A Lesson in Food

Everyone has to eat. Most of us eat organic matter to sustain ourselves while others do well feeding on the souls of forsaken demons from the deepest, darkest, most neglected portions of hell. Yes, Karl Rove likes his demonic delicacies fresh and organic so he…

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A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 7 Leave a comment Read more »

A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 7

Before I started writing on Yelp and subsequently here, I used to write 5-star reviews on Amazon. For the vast majority of them, they were either declined upon submission or removed soon after. A few, the more tame ones, were lucky enough to remain. This…

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I Should Have a Urine Fetish, But I Don't 2 Comments Read more »

I Should Have a Urine Fetish, But I Don’t

As a kid, I used to love peeing on everything except a toilet almost as much as R. Kelly. I don’t know why. To this day I haven’t been able to uncover the reason for my fascination with glazing everything with my bladder butter. Since…

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A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 6 Leave a comment Read more »

A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 6

Before I started writing on Yelp and subsequently here, I used to write 5-star reviews on Amazon. For the vast majority of them, they were either declined upon submission or removed soon after. A few, the more tame ones, were lucky enough to remain. This…

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A Lesson in Women 5 Comments Read more »

A Lesson in Women

In the words of every black comedian ever, “bitches be crazy.” They have more issues than Time Magazine. More baggage than a train station in China. More hang-ups than a telemarketer. More emotional problems than… a person with a lot of emotional problems. It’s commonly…

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A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 5 Leave a comment Read more »

A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 5

Before I started writing on Yelp and subsequently here, I used to write 5-star reviews on Amazon. For the vast majority of them, they were either declined upon submission or removed soon after. A few, the more tame ones, were lucky enough to remain. This…

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A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 4 1 Comment Read more »

A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 4

Before I started writing on Yelp and subsequently here, I used to write 5-star reviews on Amazon. For the vast majority of them, they were either declined upon submission or removed soon after. A few, the more tame ones, were lucky enough to remain. This…

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A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 3 Leave a comment Read more »

A Trek Through the Amazon: The Lost Reviews, Volume 3

Before I started writing on Yelp and subsequently here, I used to write 5-star reviews on Amazon. For the vast majority of them, they were either declined upon submission or removed soon after. A few, the more tame ones, were lucky enough to remain. This…

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